3 Essential Facts About your Feelings

Here is a great short video I found that focuses on three essential facts about feelings and emotions. It is from the great website Six Seconds , which " is the first and largest organization supporting EQ development globally. Businesses, schools, consultants, and individuals use our scientifically rigorous tools and solutions to create positive change." EQ is short for Emotional Quotient or Emotional Intelligence. The three facts it stresses are:

1. Feelings and emotions are messages

2. All emotions are valuable

3. Emotions are part of our bodies.

I believe that Emotional Intelligence or EQ is something that needs to be taught directly and reinforced throughout our society. It needs to be integrated as part of a comprehensive Social Emotional Learning curriculum in schools (SEL) as well as part of a Positive Culture in Businesses.  Short informational videos such as these help us better understand our emotions and the actions of others.  Through this understanding we can work more efficiently in the work place and help to prevent the cognitive dissonance and alienation that many individuals feel in our increasingly insular society.

5 Ways for Teachers to increase Mindful Awareness in the Classroom

As Mindfulness in schools goes mainstream, new and practical ways of classroom integration continue to be explored and enjoyed by teachers. Increasing mindful awareness in classrooms can help reduce teacher and student stress, increase attention and focus and foster social emotional competence. Although not a full mindfulness program, teachers can implement these quick and easy mindful based activities into their daily routine in order to help foster the awareness that comes from a full mindfulness practice. The following 5 activities can be implemented throughout the day in order to help students transfer between activities, de-stress after a test, and refocus after an exciting project or experiment. Although created for elementary age students, these ideas could easily be revised for high school or college age students as well.



1. Mindful Minutes- Mindful Breathing is the foundation of any Mindful practice and should be the first thing that is taught to children. This technique is best taught by teaching children to focus on a sound, then slowly transfer their attention to their own breathing. A mindfulness bell is a great way of transitioning between a sound and  breathing. By focusing on breathing children "anchor" themselves in the moment and focus inward. If you cannot find a mindfulness bell, a chime, triangle or singing bowl can also work. Once the sound goes away have the students focus on their breath for 1 "Mindful Minute". These Mindful Minutes can be included at any time of the day between any activity. It's especially good to start the day with a Mindful Minute or have one after coming back from lunch or recess. As children get better at focusing for the full minute you can increase the time to 2 minutes or 5 minutes.

2. Cool Down with Yoga- A simple series of Yoga poses are a great way to get children moving within a classroom and ground themselves in the moment. For teachers that are unfamiliar with Yoga there are a few classroom based Yoga programs that give more detail about how to infuse Yoga into a school setting such as Go Grounded Yoga, Yoga 4 Classrooms, and Yoga in My School. Learning a simple Sun Salutation and guiding your class through it, is a quick and easy way to get them moving and mindful of their bodies. Have your students focus on where their bodies are in space as well as how they feel after 1-2 rounds. Also encourage them to focus their attention on their breath, coordinating in and out breaths with each pose in the series. If there is not enough room to do sun salutations focus on some standing poses such as Tree, Mountain or Warrior. Here is the Grounded Flow Clock from the Go Grounded program which is a great visual to help student learn the classic sun salutation. A Yoga break is a great way to transition between activities and get kids blood flowing between long periods of sitting.

3. Mindful Seeing- This a great activity to build children's awareness and ability to sustain focused-attention. It helps children recognize the difference between just looking/labeling something vs. acknowledging/being aware of the personal experience of seeing something in its individuality. Mindful seeing can be accomplished with any object. I like using lemons. Grab about 6 different lemons and have your classroom break into 6 different groups. Assign each group a lemon and have them all look at the lemon very closely. Have them touch it, look for special bumps, notice the size and any individual characteristics. After five minutes collect all the lemons and put them in a basket. Shake the basket then pull out one lemon at a time and have each group try to decide if that is their lemon. This activity helps the children understand the multi-sensory aspects of memory as well as how we engage all of our senses during active observation.

4. Mindful Listening- As music lover I really enjoy this activity and often practice this on my own when I am listening to music or taking a walk. You can pick a children's song (there are a variety of children's songs out there) or a current song from the radio. Try to have the students actively listen to each instrument and melody in the song. It may be helpful to pause the music and hum the bass line, or the melody and then play the song again. Try to have the students focus on one particular part of the song and only that part of the song. For example the guitar may be playing a melody. Teach the students to recognize the guitar and focus on the guitar only. After a couple of minutes switch to another instrument. This is great activity to try during music class. Another listening activity that I enjoy is having students close their eyes and listen to the quiet room for thirty second. After thirty seconds have them list all the sounds that they came up with on the board. Try the same activity again and this time listen quietly in the room for a full minute. See if the class is able to  notice more sounds than before. This is a great activity to anchor students in the moment and practice focused attention and concentration.

5. Wishing Good Will-  Good will wishes are a great way to develop gratitude in your classroom as well as a positive classroom environment. Research has shown favorable results from positive affirmations as well as acknowledging gratitude. Positive Psychology is a growing field that touts neuroscience as support for the positive effects of optimism and other positive thoughts within a classroom setting. One activity to facilitate positivity and interconnectedness in the classroom is developing good will wishes. This can be completed by having students take a mindful minute (as stated above) and think about someone granting them one good will wish that can help someone else. They can send the wish to themselves silently saying "I wish that .....". Have them repeat the wish to themselves silently. Encourage them to notice how they feel when they say the wish. Next, after a minute or two, they can focus on a friend in the class or a family member. Send that person the wish and silently say " I wish that (person of choice)......" Again, encourage them to recognize how they feel when they wish good will to others. After about five minutes have them focus back on their breathing and slowly switch attention back to the classroom. These well wishes can be referred to throughout the day if disagreements arise. It is also a great way to start of the day or week.

By incorporating these ideas into their classrooms, teachers can begin to build mindful awareness and social emotional competence with their students. Although not a full curriculum, these activities can help to foster stress reduction and awareness. They can also help with transitions between activities and create a classroom culture that is ripe for learning. For more information regarding mindfulness in schools, refer to the following links:

• Mindful Schools
• Mindful Kids
• MindUP
• Association for Mindfulness in Education
• Tools For Peace

TTYL ... or not

With the rise of technology as a purveyor of social interactions and information, society has to rely on messaging as a means of communication. Whether it is email, text messaging, video chatting or any number of numerous applications used on smart phones (Whats Ap, Hey Tell, BBM, i message, ect....) technology seems to be the middle man that sells our social exchanges. Within the context of efficiency this has made out lives a lot easier. We can respond to others on the go, return messages with ease and even automate responses to others- effectively making ourselves available 24/7. However, as fully functioning adults most of us have had practice developing our interpersonal skills prior to relying on technology. We have had meetings with teachers, talks with coaches and middle school social gatherings, all of which have helped to shape our social etiquette and ability to self-reflect on our role in face-to-face interactions. Fast forward to Generation Y , or the Mellenials (those born between 1981 and 2000 ), and suddenly there is a great number of individuals that have grown up not knowing what it is like to have to call someone on the phone or, heaven for bid, write a letter. Although some of the early Generation Y babies grew up during the transition to the digital age (1981- 1991), many children in this generation (and the one coming after it) will grow up in an era where communication will no longer require another human being to be physically present. What are the social ramifications of this? How will this impact our future generations ability to problem solve and communicate effectively? The short answer is IDK (I don't know). Unfortunately this is a question that will have to be discussed within our nations school system, where children first learn the ability to work with others and develop face-to face communication skill.

A recent consumer report indicates that of the 20 million minors who use Facebook, 1/3 are under the age of 13 (which is the minimum age necessary for an account as well as the age of protection for the Children's Online Privacy Act). Among these users 5 million are under the age of 10 and are unsupervised by their parents. Along with minors using social media to communicate, daily text messaging has increased from 50 messages per day in 2009 to 60 messages per day in 2011. Texting has become the number one preferred manner of communication for teenagers (talking face to face is a dismal third according to a 2010 pew research report.) Data suggests that even with the opportunity to have a face-to-face conversations over phones and computers, only 1 in 5 Americans have even tried it. Not having to face someone else is the easy way out and eliminates the emotional baggage that comes with face-to-face conversations. This is the logical progression of a society that is obsessed with efficiency.  The data is overwhelmingly obvious of the transition away from face-to-face communication as the preferred method for our nations youth; however, interpersonal communication is a skill that must be developed in future generations.

As children grow and navigate through the world, they must use language and communication to develop schemas in order to understand reality. These schemas are created through active construction with the world around them. A child must assimilate new information into a schema in order to create an understanding between what they know and what they perceive. If there is a discrepancy between what is know and what is experienced, then preconceived notions must be accommodated in order to support this new experience. This is especially important in during communication with others. According to communication researcher Albert Mehrabian, when we are forming an attitude (or in this case a schema) during a social exchange 55% of our information comes from nonverbal cues, 38% comes from tone of voice and 7% comes from word meaning. These numbers form the basis of the infamous 7:38:55 % rule. Now it should be noted that these numbers are applicable within the context of creating a judgement (like or dislike) regarding what is being said  or how it is being said. For example, an eighth grade student telling another 8 grade student "That bag is soooo swag (cool)." If one is confused whether they are being serious or sarcastic, most will heavily rely on tone and nonverbal cues such as body language to decipher such.

 Hopefully we can see where this is all going. As children mature and have to read ambiguous social communication cues it is imperative that they hone their nonverbal communication abilities. Cyber-bullying as well as child predators thrive on the inability to perceive nonverbal cues during exchanges on Facebook or other social media. Further, as online learning websites grow in popularity,  children will begin to miss out on the group work and teacher scaffolding that builds social skills and communication. Most important is the emotional context which is lost through "e communication". When using social media and texting, we don't build the empathy, shared enjoyment and theory of mind necessary to not only sustain relationships but also learn about the world.

 As technology grew, schools made it a point to educate our children on how to use technology, from media classes to integrating technology into curriculum. However, when this technology takes over as a dominant form of communication style it will also be our responsibility as educators to teach effective communication styles. This will most likely need to be directly taught as it is with children with Autism and Asperger's Syndrome. Just as there is now a class period to learn how to use a computer, it may be necessary to have a class period in the future to learn how to read others in face-to-face conversations.

Reviewing some of the current interventions in this area leads mostly to social skill interventions with regards to children with Asperger's Disorder, Autism and Emotional/ Behavioral difficulties. However, as this issue continues to grow these programs may also be appropriate for kids who are more intent on texting than talking:

Empirically based Social Skills programs:

"Stop and Think" Social Skills Program (Knoff): Part of Project ACHIEVE (Knoff and Batsche). Has demonstrated success in reducing student discipline referrals to the principal's office, school suspensions, and expulsions; fostering positive school climates and prosocial interactions; increasing students' on-task behavior; and improving academic performance. http://www.projectachieve.info

Primary Mental Health Project (Cowen et al.) Targets children K-3 and addresses social and emotional problems that interfere with effective learning. It has been shown to improve learning and social skills, reduce acting, shyness and anxious behaviors, and increase frustration tolerances. http://www.sharingsuccess.org/code/eptw/profiles/48.html

The EQUIP Program (Gibbs, Potter, & Goldstein) Offers a three-part intervention method for working with antisocial or behavior disordered adolescents. The approach includes training in moral judgment, anger management/correction of thinking errors, and prosocial skills. http://www.researchpress.com/scripts/product.asp?item=4848#5134

The PREPARE Curriculum (Goldstein) Presents a series of 10 course-length interventions grouped into three areas: reducing aggression, reducing stress, and reducing prejudice. It is designed for use with middle school and high school students but can be adapted for use with younger students. http://www.researchpress.com/scripts/product.asp?item=5063

The ACCEPTS Program (Walker et al) Offers a complete curriculum for teaching effective social skills to students at middle and high school levels. The program teaches peer-to-peer skills, skills for relating to adults, and self-management skills. http://www.proedinc.com/customer/productView.aspx?ID=625&SearchWord=ACCEPTS%20PROGRAM

Mindful Consultation

The previously posted quote "We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are" is a great example of why Mindfulness is important in the area of School Based Consultation / Instructional Consultation (IC). The above video halariously shows how school based problem solving can go terribly wrong. As School Psychologists we also serve as  instructional consultants. Effective collaboration skills are imperative for providing school-based service delivery that enhances academic achievement in students.

In general School Psychologists enter into a consultee-centered relationship with school staff and parents that usually has the basic goal of enhancing academic achievement in students (this may also include increasing or decreasing behaviors which impede upon this goal). School Psychology: A Blueprint for Training and Practice III (Ysseldyke et al., 2006) identified interpersonal and collaborative skills as foundational competencies that are "indispensable for school psychologists" (p. 15). As a Consultant you possesses some piece of knowledge that a consultee inherently seeks. This knowledge is the foundation of the data -based decision making and problem solving process. However, it should be noted, that  psychological consultation consists of a problem-solving, interpersonal relationship that develops through periodic face-to-face contacts between consultant and consultee (Erchul, 2003). This  interpersonal relationship is just as important as whatever knowledge the consultee is seeking. Building a positive relationship is imperative and must be approached in a nonherarchical manner in order to resolve a problem. This may be difficult for some  Psychologists (like our friend above) or other porfessionals that have sacrificed 6 years of their life on a PhD that ultimately screams hierarchy (the below graph is by no means scientific)

This is where Mindfulness comes into play and can inform how we build and maintain interpersonal relationships. Practicing Mindfulness not only helps us acknowledge our own thoughts and emotions, but it can also foster compassion for those around us. Practicing Mindfulness actives neural integration of the Pre-Frontal Cortex (PFC). When activated, the specific area of the PFC know as the "medial prefrontal cortex", supports our ability to take in communication signals and be influenced by that information (Siegel, 2007). This area of the brain is also responsible for Empathy, which helps us stay open with others during difficult times.

By increasing awareness of what is happening in the moment we can acknowledge our emotions or assumptions that may impede on what is trying to be communicated. This ability is at the heart of Mindful Listening. Some of the ways one can listen Mindfully include:

• Body Awareness: Paying Attention to your body and facilitating openness during listening (e.g. arms not crossed, relaxed shoulders)
• Eye Contact:
• Listen for Significance: Why is the person saying what they are saying, what do they need from me in this moment, Do they need advice? or just need to share without feedback? Many times teachers and other school personnel just need to vent and do not need your expert opinion.
• Ask for Clarification: Clarifying questions help you better understand what a consultee may need. This is especially important in with regards to Problem Identification within the IC framework.

If Listening skills are necessary with regards to building interpersonal relationships then Mindfulness of Speech is the other side of the same coin. Before any verbal exchange one should take a moment to establish what their intention is in this exchange. Marshal Rosenberg, author of Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life, breaks intention down to two categories, the intention to create connection or the intention to create separation. With regards to IC the intention should always be to connect the consultee to information that helps resolve a problem they are having . Acknowledging preconceived notions or judgments that may impede upon this intention are a crucial part of engaging in Mindful Speech. This includes paying attention to how and why we say things. This may be difficult during a heated exchange, or a conversation that involves unresolved feelings (the Speech/ Language Therapist above may have a previous negative history with the Psychologist); however, with a Mindfulness practice that includes staying in the moment and creating space between thoughts and actions this ability will soon become part of your communication style.

Therefore, when talking about Instructional or Behavioral Consultation within the context of School Psychology, one must not be primarily concerned about problem solving (or declaring who has a greater knowledge base). It is also important to build and maintain an active and healthy personal relationship that has foundations in Mindful Communication skills which foster intentions that include collaboration, empathy and connection.

References:

Erchul, W. P. (2003).  Communication and interpersonal processes in consultation: Guest editor’s comments. Journal of Educational and Psychological Consultation, 14, 105-107.

Siegel, Daniel J. (2007) The Mindful Brain. New York, New York: W.W. Norton Company